what am I tinking abt?
I am afraid.. This rs may go to waste again.. just like the rest..
Why afraid?
I believe I am (truly truly truly)^1million tat I'm in love with her.. and still falling..
however.. I keep having this tinking.. that...
I've been thru that.. Things can be sweet.. but still end up disgustingly bitter in the end..
Afterall.. I'm onli 21 and she's onli 18 yrs old..
she support that tinking too.. but since she support tat tinking.. does it mean she's mature enuff? well.. she's indeed more mature than anyone i've seen on the floor...even some guy frens of mine does not possess such maturity.. tat was perhaps the most impt reason for me being attracted to her at the beginning..
Will having *** in a rs affect anything? seriously.. its an alien boundary that i'm stepping into.. and i really dunno wat i can tink to do abt anything.
Financially.. am i ok to upkeep her? Practical her will definitely xian qi mi.. i can't stop tinking abt that.
I'll definitely have to go thru rough times.. do i have enuff faith that she'll stay by my side? Bro.. Faith has to be built.. its NOT and NV a blessed kinda thing...
thanks ruke.
I am truly madly deeply in love with her.. In fact.. its MORE than ever before even if i were to compare to the rest that had walked passed my life.. but I'm pretty afraid I may get hurt again... back to square one qn! damn bad.
Ruke: You dun trust her?
Of course not! She had showered on me so much love.. When I thought I knew love and how it felt like when I was in love with shir.. She brought me to a brand new era of love.. it was amazing.. breathe taking and as a matter of fact.. crazy good. Which brings me to the state of fear of losing her in anyway..
Frankly..
which gf in this world.. will bring her bf to cut hair at a cheap and good store..
"" eat with her bf but SHE'S THE ONE buying the food always? which gf
"" pat her bf to slp when she needs slp herself?
"" stand up for her bf against HER FAMILY?
"" change for the better.. and become more tolerant and patient from her previous being just because her bf ask her to do so?
"" buy her bf breakfast.. when she's staying ALL the freaking long way at HG?
"" get her bf the things he need because he asks for it?
All the above are VERY significant happenings that confirmed the reconfirmation in my heart that I WILL NEVER CHEAT ON HER OR LET HER DOWN IN ANY WAY(S). she's just too good to be true.. and she's more than I can ask for.. more over.. she's more than compatible with me. maybe not class lvl wise.. but all the other things. All i wanna do.. is to treat her good.. and if possible, better than she do.. and indulge in this bliss that I possibly had earned from my previous life. I nv wanna let her go.. nv wanna lose her.. nv wanna treat her bad.. nv wanna chase her away.. Sounds possessive.. but yes.. I am like that.. I've learnt thru the hard way that I AM indeed a possessive guy.. and I believe she loves it that way oso.. because it makes her feel SUPERBLY WANTED. heheeehee..
okay.. let me continute..
Monetary wise.. I am SO tight.. I can't even handle my finance well.. shit me.
ruke: Can learn... and Can earn....
thanks again, ruke..
Seriously.. I am very worried abt my dad's health..
he's probably going thru some damn bad stress being pulled by two ladies.. or rather.. one lady and the other.. bitch..
Money wise.. he confirm damn stress oso.. electricity bill... gonna be out of job soon.. probably quite a big hit in his life.. since he nv experience this before...
He'll worry abt us.. the kids.. and his ever so spendthrift wife.. my mum..
My bro.. dun really like to study..mum have hopes on him.. since we're the onli brothers.. long term tinking.. if he dun study well.. he's gonna suffer.. and tinking for the family as a whole.. if he dun earn the same as mi or abt the same.. no matter how much i earn.. its not gonna be enuff! damn it for being in a poor family.
I really hope bro had gone thru some tinking and will really buck up.
This stupid NS i'm going thru.. Hate it.. I need to earn more.. even if its just a few hundred bucks more.. NS is just a waste of time despite it had gotten mi more than enuff to learn.
My mum.. she's always alone at home.. no matter coming home from work or now tat she's having a holiday due to the renovation of the coffeeshop she's working at.
I'm damn worried that she'll anyhow tink.. anyhow act... esp. when dad's not at home too.. and my bro.. he keeps running out.. or rather.. thats wat i saw.. i dunno wat are the other things he do.. cos i'm always at work! damn it again!
Now you noe why I hate work/NS so much yah?
ruke: yeah. fuck it man.
I really hope to spend more time with my parents and my bro and of course.. my deardear.. while i can do my favourite sports to upkeep myself disciplinary wise and fitness also.
Can that happen? Yes.. with planning.. but how? Can anyone help me?
Checkout~
Ray.
9:08 AM
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About The
GQ's Profile:
ID:
GQ/QinG/KK/Rukawa
Day of Generation:
09 AugusT 1984
ZodIaRk ~ LeO
Inner BeasT ~ Mice
Loves:
- Samsam/Samantha
- Basketball *Passion*
- Swimming
- Running
- BlooD *Craving*
- Sensual Pain~
- Kitties and Puppies *Cuddle*
- My brothers and sisters
- My Real family and my brother
- StrawBerriEs
- Hugx and Caresses
- Nibbles and Kisses
- Orgasms
- Well defined Muscles
- Flat Abs
- 34D =)
- Programming (Not a Geek either)
- Beach
- Getting Sun-Kissed
- Pple who dares to be themselves and not hide
- bitches sometimes :)
- Loves and Romance..
- To lend a helping hand/listenin ear at ALL times =)
- Betrayers
- Backstabbers
- Liars
- HypocRytes
- Pple who breaks promises
- Arrogant pple
- Pple who act holy
- Bastards
- Bittergourd
- NS
- Lazy pple/Pple w No Urgency
*Mei*~~Rong~~
GwenGwen
JiaYuan
*Mei*~~Rachel~~
Yu
Dael
Mike
Lester
Kenny
Desire~List
- DEARIE'S HUGX AND KISSES
- New Phone.. 6230I
- Nike Bag.. 82.95
- Abs.
- Bigger Biceps and Triceps.
- Better Complexion
- Better Health...
- Black Jeans
- Orange Shirt
- Grey Pants
- Black Leather Belt
MSN/Friendster: rukawa_koh@hotmail.com
Email: rukawa_gq@yahoo.com / rukawa.gq@gmail.com
"In~LoVeS'~"
SY's Profile:
Samantha Yeo Su Yun
18 years old
Singapore Poly
Lifeguard, Financial Trade
Sports, swimming esp!, life-saving, shopping, taking pictures
Wishlist:
i'm so happy with dear now that i cant wish for more!!=)
Links:
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